The boy under glass
by Supikun
Summary: Tsubasa Reservoir Chronciles angsts...
1. Boy under glass, Evil Sayaron

Who…

I don't know how long I have been in here, in this prison…

I hear voices – one of them sounds mother-like…

The other – I can tell despises me…

I want to wring his neck…

He wants me to kill...

He wants to use me and abuse me…

But there is another voice within me, another presence…

Like someone on the outside…

My hand moves, I know his moves…

I can feel him, he can feel me…

I want him to kill…

I want to kill…

Kill…

Kill…

Kill…

Kill…

Kill…

Kill…

Kill…

I want to see the fire and blood he sees…

I want to fight to my hearts content…

I want to see the flames and blood he sees…

But there is someone else inside of my head…

Green eyes…

Pure green eyes…

And a pure smile…

There is something about that smile…

Something I want…

Something that makes me forget about killing…

Who is she?

What does she want?

What effect does she have on me?

I know her name…

But cannot move or speak it…

I want to move…

I want to speak it…

I want to hold her…

I want to have her…

She is mine…

I want her smile…

I want to see that smile…

I don't not care if the whole world is destroyed by blood and fire…

I want to be liberated…

I want to have that grin on her face…

I know her name – it is very beautiful…

But cannot budge or articulate it…

I want to move about…

I want to speak her name…

I want to embrace her…

I want to have her…

She is mine…

I want her smile…

I want to see that smile…

Sakura…


	2. Fai D Flowright

Fai

Do I smile because I am Happy?

Do I smile because I am sad?

Do I smile because it hurts inside?

The number of bodies I have climbed over to be here is too many…

Do I smile because I am Happy?

Do I smile because I am sad?

Do I smile because it hurts inside?

The one in black hates me, despises my nature, he does not see that the world is cruel but it is better to put on a smile and accept the cruelty than become bitter…

Do I smile because I am Happy?

Do I smile because I am sad?

Do I smile because it hurts inside?

Am I trying to die?

Do I smile because I am Happy?

Do I smile because I am sad?

Do I smile because it hurts inside?

Why am I avoiding this?

Do I smile because I am Happy?

Do I smile because I am sad?

Do I smile because it hurts inside?

Why do I hesitate about my magic? Every time that boy puts himself in harms way, I am sorely tempted…

Do I smile because I am Happy?

Do I smile because I am sad?

Do I smile because it hurts inside?

That boy… He throws himself into everything – if that witch offered his life in trade for Sakura, he would have accepted immediately…

Do I smile because I am Happy?

Do I smile because I am sad?

Do I smile because it hurts inside?

Why don't I use my magic? Am I that afraid?

Do I smile because I am Happy?

Do I smile because I am sad?

Do I smile because it hurts inside?

Am I that afraid of that devil, that lover, that king, that lord of destruction …?

Do I smile because I am Happy?

Do I smile because I am sad?

Do I smile because it hurts inside?

Why should I continue on? No matter what that devil will come for me…

Do I smile because I am Happy?

Do I smile because I am sad?

Do I smile because it hurts inside?

I think for now, I will continue smiling, smiling forever, until he comes…


	3. Kerogane, Ninja Swordsman

Kurogane angst:

I wish I could write a haiku or any poem…

I cannot…

My skill is the sword…

I am ninja – I do not fail.

To live by it, to feel it, and to revel in its life…

But she has stolen part of me…

The only one that I will never speak of…

The only one I think of…

Even with that annoying white-haired man and this mochi repeating everything he says…

I wish I could write a haiku or any poem…

I cannot…

My skill is the sword…

I am ninja – I do not fail.

The one I can only think of has stolen part of me, how can I kill? How can I defend others that are with me or defend myself if I know it will weaken me?

I am ninja – I do not fail.

I kill those in front of me, I kill those who oppose me and the ones I am with, and I kill those who would dare threaten my land's Miko…

The Miko, my land's Princess, the only one I will ever serve…

I wish I could write a haiku or any poem…

I cannot…

My skill is the sword…

I am ninja – I do not fail.

That witch has stolen my silver dragon, my sword…

The sword is the source of a warrior's power and life…

My Princess has stolen my strength, but that witch has stolen more…

The Miko, my land's Princess, the only one I will ever serve…

I wish I could write a haiku or any poem…

I cannot…

My skill is the sword…

I am ninja – I do not fail.

That boy is too eager to fight; he will do anything for that girl…

He has given up all sense of a life to have her back the way she was, but that shall never be…

I pity them…

They are too young to know of love…

However, that boy is willing and able to learn how to fight…

I wish I could write a haiku or any poem…

I cannot…

My skill is the sword…

I am ninja – I do not fail.

Even though that boy says "he shall not incontinence me," I am forced to teach him how to fight…

For if I don't I will have the guilt of someone's death on my hands…

And that girl that he will die for will surely cry…

I wish I could write a haiku or any poem…

I cannot…

My skill is the sword…

I am ninja – I do not fail.

Princess Tomoyo is this the strength you are trying to show me?

What kind of sick game are you playing, my Sun Princess?

Every time, I see your form in a different world, I hope it is you…

I want you to take this curse off of me…

I want to do what I like and when I like…

But every time I do see your form, my only Princess, I want to be near her – I want to protect her…


	4. Mokona, Master of 108 secret techniques

Mokona

Don't pull my ears, don't stretch my mouth, and don't cook me in a pot…

I am not a peach bun, rice ball, or mochi, I am Mokona!

There I was quietly sleeping next to my black brother, always together, never apart…

When he ate, I got full…

When I drunk booze, he got drunk …

We together were so much fun…

With our "parents" – Clow and Yuuko…

They created us and blessed us with 108-techniques...

Now we are separated by so much…

Separate but together…

Don't pull my ears, don't stretch my mouth, and don't cook me in a pot…

I am not a peach bun, rice ball, or mochi, I am Mokona!

Now I am with others…

A cute girl who I always try to keep smiling…

I such a playboy, girls love me so much anyway!

Te-he!

A serious boy…

A funny little magician…

And a scary man in black…

Why doesn't he like me?

Why won't he hug me?

The cute girl does, the serious boy does, the white-haired magician does…

Why does he stuff me everywhere – pockets, down shirts, pants…

Everywhere…

Why doesn't he like me?

I am such a likeable guy!

I am so popular…

Sniff…

Hug me, mister black…

Pease hug me…


	5. Princess Sakura

Sakura.

Every little bit helps…

I do my best and try my hardest to remember…

It has been said that the greatest and most invincible spell is "Never give up hope; I will surely be alright, I will surely see this through…"

I know my father said something like this…

I am not sure…

There is soo little of me…

So little there…

Each little feather helps…

I try my hardest to remember…

"Never give up hope; I will surely be alright, I will surely see this through…"

There is one memory that slips through my fingers…

This boy, this Sayaron-kun…

Who is he?

What is he?

Who is he towards me?

All he says is that he is helping me and that he once visited my home…

And that I am a princess…

What is he towards me?

Is he a faithful servant, a dog to follow the fool?

For I once heard father say that the dog always follows and serves "The Fool;" "The Seeker" in the Tarot.

I know my father said something like this…

I am not sure…

There is soo little of me…

So little there…

Each little feather helps…

I try my hardest to remember…

"Never give up hope; I will surely be alright, I will surely see this through…"

Who is he?

Is he a long-lost sibling?

The way he works so hard, I think not…

I wish I had one more feather to be sure…

What is he?

Is he a friend?

A friend would not go that far…

I wish I was so sure…

There is soo little of me…

There are so little memories there…

Each little feather helps…

I try my hardest to remember…

"Never give up hope; I will surely be alright, I will surely see this through…"

Who is Sayaoran-kun?

Is he a lover?

I hope that the next feather says so…

When I smile, he smiles, and I want to continue smiling so he'll smile as well…

I wish I was so sure…

There is soo little of me…

There are so little memories there…

Each little feather helps…

I try my hardest to remember…

"Never give up hope; I will surely be alright, I will surely see this through…"

Why do I turn all red when he is close?

Why does he turn red when I am close to him?

I wonder if this is love…

Or something else…

One more feather, please…

One more and I will be sure…


	6. Yuuko, the Witch of Dementions

Yuuko

More than one Sakura…

More than one Sayoran…

One little wolf born to one who is like a mirror image of graceful self….

(My observation of Yuuko's as the Witch of Dimensions has a similar look to Yelan, Sayaoran's mother, CCS)

His Sakura cursed with a book full of cards, some based on the Tarot…

So many troubles, all to teach her responsibility for them…

Clow, you twisted man…

An that reincarnation of that twisted man, I think he calls himself Eriol, whom I hope stays in England with his lover…

That shrine maiden, named Kaho…

Clow, you twisted man…

The other Sakura…

I also deeply pity…

What was that man thinking?

I pity her Sayoran…

I pray that they will life happily ever after like the other two plans to do…

Once that Sayoran (CCS) gets up the nerve to ask Sakura to marry him…

That will be so fine for them…

Maybe I should pop by and catch the bouquet…

The sake there will have to be divine…

"Watanuki more wine!"

As for the other, it will be many more troubles and horrors beyond imagining…

"Me, too!"

"You really shouldn't drink so much!"

"Com on, Watanuki-chan, there are many reasons to drink!"

"Kompai!"

"Kompai!"

To drink to forget…


	7. Sorata, Hanshin Republic

Sorata, Hanshin Republic

My miko is very beautiful and nice...

If you dare lay a hand on her so help me, mister black, we will have words…

SMACK

What was that for?

Don't you love me?

My honey?

Living together alone in this nice apartment complex, with one extra room…

Don't you think a baby carriage makes a good set of transportation?

SMACK

What was that for?

Don't you love me?

My honey?

Our new guests are fine…

But someone made a mess of the clothing, and even tried on one of your old miko clothes and one of my shirts…

Not that I am blaming anyone…

If you dare lay a hand on her so help me, mister black, we will have words…

SMACK

What was that for?

Don't you love me?

Our guests are fine…

But this Sayaoran is the kindest but most tragic…

The one in white, Fai, is nice but…

If you dare lay a hand on her so help me, mister black, we will have words…

SMACK

What was that for?

Don't you love me?


	8. Vampire Hunter Seishiro

Seishiro, Vampire Hunter

Subaru

My chase has led me to a new land.

I have sacrificed much life and my eye to that witch

All to stop you lord of vampires

Subaru

In this new land full of sand burly men is chasing a small boy that is between seven and ten

They are after that book

The book that could mention you

All to kill you

Subaru

Subaru

My chase has led me to a new land.

I have sacrificed much life and my eye to that witch

All to stop you lord of vampires

Subaru

Tossing those brutes was the easy part

But this boy, this boy that may be only a copy of another, was ready to fight me to the death for the book

Just like you, Subaru

That book that could locate you

All to stop you lord of vampires

Subaru

My chase has led me to a new land.

I have sacrificed much life and my eye to that witch

All to stop you lord of vampires

Subaru

Though I can tell this boy is not form this work and may not be human, he offers me that book saying I am honest

The first kind face I have seen since your sister and you

Subaru

My chase has led me to a new land.

I have sacrificed much life and my eye to that witch

All to stop you lord of vampires

Subaru

The book is written in the glyphs of the land, I cannot read , he offers me a trade…

This one called Syaoran offers me it

How honest of him

All he want to know is how to fight…

I will teach him as he translates

Subaru

My chase has led me to a new land.

I have sacrificed much life and my eye to that witch

All to stop you lord of vampires

Subaru

I moved on leaving my only student, my only Syaoran

My only Syaoran

My chase has led me to a new land.

I have sacrificed much life and my eye to that witch

All to stop you lord of vampires

Subaru

Many worlds I have gone and now this feather is the only key to extending it – the world I see have come to its last, I must use this which is not mine

My only Syaoran

My chase has led me to a new land.

I have sacrificed much life and my eye to that witch

All to stop you lord of vampires

Subaru

Now who do I see with others? A wizard's powers who matches mine and your Subaru, and a ninja with cursed blood that is teaching you

My only Syaoran

My chase has led me to a new land.

I have sacrificed much life and my eye to that witch

All to stop you lord of vampires

Subaru

He is teaching my student, my only Syaoran

He is stealing you away, my only Syaoran

I should move on…

Which of them made this devil's deal?

And who is this with you?

A puff ball and a little girl

A girl whose essence is familiar to me, her eyes vacant without a soul – did this poor firl make a deal with that witch?

What is her relationship with you

My only Syaoran

My chase has led me to a new land.

I have sacrificed much life and my eye to that witch

All to stop you lord of vampires

Subaru

One down, only you and that ninja remain. Yet you are not ready to handle that sword of flame, my only Syaoran

Yet I hesitated a little with my hand in your chest, that soulless girl is willing to die with, who is she to you

My only Syaoran

My chase has led me to a new land.

I have sacrificed much life and my eye to that witch

All to stop you lord of vampires

Subaru

She is willing to die for you and you for her, or is this just an illusion created by a machine or someone pulling the strings?

I must leave you, I must go on even if that man has stolen you from my tutelage, I must go on

My only Syaoran

My chase has led me to a new land.

I have sacrificed much life and my eye to that witch

All to stop you lord of vampires

Subaru


	9. Meiling

WARNING SPOILERS.

Even if you do not see me, I love you, my wolf.

It started when I saw my father.

The first time was when my mother, "Lady Peony," gave birth.

It was he who gave me my name.

The second time was when my father discovered that I had no magic.

Magic laid in my family's blood-line.

My mother, knew the I-Ching better than Confucius would; her father and her uncle; her grandfather; and all the way back to Kublai Khan ruled the world.

Magic was a piece of pride, so much so divorce proceedings started.

I was ignorance of how highly he placed magic, how much he wanted his accursed wish granted…

I was alone anyway.

Our family is rather traditional - a divorce meant that made me nothing more than a bastard girl-child not even worthy of keeping around.

Asking what my family did for a living, where one can live in a place where the property tax is a million dollars a year...

But not as alone as my cousin.

Even if you do not see me, I love you, my wolf.

Before he was ever born, he had a destiny so great that even I now to think of it makes me shiver.

Even if you do not see me, I love you, my wolf.

When I first met my cousin.

I was afraid of him.

Even if you do not see me, I love you, my wolf.

Everybody was, even his older sisters was scared of him.

Before he could ever walk, he trained and was prepared so much that the word "friendship" was foreign to him.

When he showed such kindness - my heart leapt.

Even if you do not see me, I love you, my wolf.

We could be alone - together.

Right then and there, I proposed marriage - or at least till he found someone better than myself.

Even if you do not see me, I love you, my wolf.

Then, my father stepped in.

He accepted my apt offer, his hand rubbed his mutton-chops on his chin.

Even if you do not see me, I love you, my wolf.

My cousin boldly looked at my father and said, "Harm my fiancé, and I will kill you."

I looked at my cousin, he was totally serious.

Even if you do not see me, I love you, my wolf.

My father wrinkled his nose and pushed me towards him.

Then, like that we could not be separated from each other.

Even if you do not see me, I love you, my wolf.

When he read, so did I.

When he trained, so did I.

When he ate, so did I.

When he slept, so did I.

Even if you do not see me, I love you, my wolf.

He was quite the study of the arts of magic and the arts of the body.

I could not do the magic, but the martial arts I learned to match him - "my wolf."

Even if you do not see me, I love you, my wolf.

Then, his late father handed him a sword - a very ancient blade and a name to go with it.

Once the plane had left the ground, his father died with one word on his lips, "Yelan."

Though on second thought, I thought I saw him add, "Or shall I call you Yuuko, my wife?"

Even if you do not see me, I love you, my wolf.

Fate turned her card.

Literally.

We fought and struggled in that foreign city.

Even if you do not see me, I love you, my wolf.

In that city, he met another girl - the Card Mistress Sakura.

The girl he was destined for - the girl he was willing to die for.

I hated her at first, that she wanted to steal "my wolf" away from me.

Even if you do not see me, I love you, my wolf.

But, she and "her personal stalker" won me over.

We fought well, saved the world against a great evil.

Even if you do not see me, I love you, my wolf.

Within two years, I was ready to accept his marriage to that other girl - thanks to myself and "her personal stalker."

To think of that stalker, god…

Her video camera.

Half my wolf's life is now permanently set on video tape.

Even if you do not see me, I love you, my wolf.

Her dressmaking.

Who else did insist to make all the Mistress's clothing, including the wedding clothing?

If it wasn't for me, that stalker would have taped the wedding night.

Even if you do not see me, I love you, my wolf.

I helped "my wolf" buy the ring with thoughts of being named godmother to his their not-yet born son.

Even if you do not see me, I love you, my wolf.

That is when my father reappeared.

I thought him to be dead - now I do wish him dead.

He decided to punish me - for failure.

He decided to tell me his plan.

Of a second Sakura on a different world, of the poison he put into her body - the feathers that would be scattered across the world.

That her life was the key to grant his wish.

His wish.

His horrible wish.

It included my wolf's unborn son.

Even if you do not see me, I love you, my wolf.

He would be sent to Yuuko, then she send him to Clow Country. He would meet and fall in love with Princess Sakura. Then my father would attack the Princess of that Country.

My wolf's son made his wish towards Yuuko, to change the hands of time and fate - creating a boy called "Watanuki Kimiharo" to take his place as the Card Mistress's son.

Even if you do not see me, I love you, my wolf.

My wolf's son would be imprisoned, by my father, and he would place a clone to make his wish come true.

Even if you do not see me, I love you, my wolf.

The clone, an obedient soulless doll that would do anything to get his wish granted.

That doll will go to different worlds, as real boy stays sealed in a glass tube.

Meanwhile, the boy known as "Watanuki" takes the real boy's place as Sakura's son living a false life.

However, this could be changed if I marry "my wolf."

Even if you do not see me, I love you, my wolf.

I knew it to be a lie - my father was lying - "How best to get it granted through me, that I should have used every trick to win "my wolf" back?"

Even if you do not see me, I love you, my wolf.

I looked at my father in horror.

His wish was terrible.

"I know him, he will kill you," I said to him entering a fighting stance.

Even if you do not see me, I love you, my wolf.

"And you do not even care if I kill you?"

"Either way, I know my wolf and his son will take after him, he will kill you," I replied, "Father," I corrected myself, "No, Fei Wong Reed."

Even if you do not see me, I love you, my wolf.

Good-bye, Syaoran…

Even if you do not see me, I love you, my wolf.

* * *

"Asking what my family did for a living, where one can live in a place where the property tax is a million dollars a year."

This is taken from guesses in the Card Captor Sakura 1st Movie - Meiling met Sakura at Bird Street in Hong Kong (the next street over is Cat Street, home of Triads), then they moved a short distance onto Syaoran's home. Using a Hong Kong map, it is likely located on "Million Dollar Hill," where the richest citizens of the city live - the property tax is estimated at a million dollars a year. With such information, many fan fiction writers suggest that Syaoran and his clan my have connections with the Triads, the author does no such thing.

* * *

"Then, his late father handed him a sword - a very ancient blade and a name to go with it."

This is taken that there is no mention of Syaoran's father in CCS, so it is likely that he is dead by the time he is capturing cards.

However, in later volumes of Tsubasa & XXX Holic:

1. Basically, CCS Syaoran's father (name unknown) gives him the sword before he captures the cards. CCS Syaoran's mother, Yelan, looks like XXXHolic's Yuuko when the witch is in her robes.

2. CCS Syaoran marries a girl named Sakura and has a son

3. CCS Syaoran gives the sword to the real-Syaoran (Tsubasa)

4. The non-cloned real-Syaoran with said sword goes to Clow Country, saves Sakura, makes a wish. It results in his imprisonment and cloning

5. Clone-Syaoran goes to different worlds, as real-Syaoran stays sealed in a glass tube. Meanwhile, Watanuki takes non-cloned Syaoran's place as (CCS) Sakura's son living a false life.

6. Real-Syaoran escapes, Fai becomes a vampire, Kurogane loses an arm, Sakura is kidnapped, and real Syaoran tells Kurogane what happened.

* * *

As for Meiling's family. It is unknown. Poetically, I decided on name "Peony" for the mother. But, tragically, I decided to have it be Fei Wong Reed himself.


End file.
